Prayer for the future

13 Jun

First, Lord: Give me laughter. May the nasally-Jokeresque-cackle constantly be produced by my svelte throat.

Let the sound only be magnified by the amount of people that help to spread it. Have this booming uproar wear itself thin because of the never-ceasing echo it stirs.

Protect me, Lord, and guide me in the decisions I make after college. If my wish for one Skins night is granted, make sure I know my limits in alcohol guzzling, white boy dancing, lip locking, cocaine snorting, tricycle riding, bed jumping, glow stick shaking, sexy time making, mosh pit thrashing adolescence.

Lead me away from sin, Keystone beer, urban ghettos, Aéropostale tees, and Minnesota.

Keep my eyes ever on you. Let me not only see the beauty of this earth, but also the beauty of black women.

Let me count my blessings along with my calories every day. Give me the strength to resist the temptation of fast food, specifically McDonalds. The reminder that their chicken nuggets are made of crushed up bones, gizzards, and boullion cubes always in the forefront of my mind.

Lord, I ask that I read my Bible every evening. Not skimping on my time with you to watch the 16th re-run of The Real Housewives of Cornwall, Missouri or Top Chef: Infants.

Have me never hurt the ones I love most. Let them understand that whether it be a remark about their ever expanding waist size, or their ever retreating hair line or my running them over with my Chrysler PT Cruiser, it’s only because I truly care.

Give me a career that I want, Lord. A career I can be proud of. Allow me to strut into my high school reunion with the knowledge that the 2008 graduating class all know that I have buckets of money awaiting me in my Boeing 747, just waiting to be spent purchasing the entire cast of Entourage or the Eiffel Tower.

Finally, dear God, bring me love. The type of love that makes me want to jump out of a plane with no parachute. The type of love that I would endure a dual Fall Out Boy-Panic! At The Disco junior high cover band concert for. The type of love that brings me closer to You.

Oh, and the good knowledge to delete my Facebook once statuses like, “2nd colonoscopy this year, whudup!” begin to dominate.

Amen

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2 Responses to “Prayer for the future”

  1. Lion June 14, 2011 at 1:31 AM #

    I’M PRINTING THIS OUT AND PUTTING IT ON MY WALL!!!!

  2. Meagan McLendon June 18, 2011 at 12:21 PM #

    This little treasure WILL be on my refrigerator.

    Along with Titanic 2.

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